Chapter 1

Middle school

Photo by Matt Gross on Unsplash

So this girl I had been friends with for a while, the one with the divorcing parents we will name her isabella. She was actually the one to introduce me to my current favorite person we will call her Ella. Ella at the time was kinda just like all of the girls at our school. She had moved into our district recently. I didn't get super close with her until 8th-grade year. I struggled with isabella the most in 8th grade. It was nice that Ella had joined the situation she had her own struggles at the time tho. she was struggling with an eating disorder I was oblivious to she also was on-off with this guy. He's not very important tho. Isabella was really going through it at this point turns out that her dad had cheated on her mom and that was why they got divorced. That transition wasn't super great. by then Isabella had already tried to commit suicide once. Once again I had no idea. the only mental issues I was knowledgeable was self-harm and her depression. She was very fragile and it was very difficult to be her friend but I felt obligated to be there for her constantly. Ella was in the same position. this is the year that we really bonded. we had lunch every day and sleepovers on the weekends. 8th grade is more of a blur so that brings us up to freshmen year. Ella and I continued to struggle to keep our friend afloat. at this time isabella had been aided by a therapist and a visit to the mental hospital. I really feel like my friends struggle with mental health really roughed up my middle school experience. not that it's supposed to be a cakewalk but I had to mature really fast. Now that Isabella had gotten the help you would think she would be good to go. that was very much not the case she got admitted once again this time it just hurt more. not sure why tho. at this time Ella had really become her only true friend because I managed to slip through the cracks. Ella also has this issue with being pushed around in hopes of saving everyone's emotions but her own. she still struggles with this. she stayed in the loop for a while but she and I continued to get closer to the point where we were each other's, only friends. I liked it this way not sure why tho. later on, she made more friends and I didn't I felt like I owed something to her idk. we both didn't associate with isabella anymore.

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